A psychologist Dr. Lalitaa Suglani has shared 7 things that can kill a relationship, from ignoring your partner’s trauma to refusing to take accountability.
She is a chartered psychologist based in UK, shared the information on her Instagram with some 100,000 followers.
She also explained in her post that relationships take ‘effort from both sides and that looks different for each person’.
Dr. Lalitaa added that usually relationships are a ‘work in progress’ and ‘great relationships’ are great because ‘both people care enough about the other person to make it work’.
She also wrote: ‘Just like the relationship with self the relationship we hold with others is always work in progress.’
‘No relationship is perfect. It takes effort from both sides and that looks different for each person based on past experiences and your love language. Relationships are work in progress.
7 Things that can kill a relationship
1. Being indirect about your wants and needs.
2. Forcing the other person to change the way you want them to be.
3. Not making an effort to understand your partner’s perspective.
4. Disengaging during disagreement instead of having ‘difficult’ conversations and/or using disrespectful language.
5. Not apologising or taking accountability.
6. Not having a life away from the relationship, such as hobbies, meeting with friends.
7. Ignoring your partner’s trauma, triggers, or past experiences.
Importance of Relationship
Among the 7 things Dr. Lalitaa listed as relationship killers were being indirect about your wants and needs.
Also changing your partner, to make them how you want them to do was second on her list.
She also mentioned that a failure to make the effort to understand your partner’s perspective can kill a relationship.
Not apologizing for things you do wrong and responsible was also among the things she listed.
According to the specialists, it’s important to maintain your own life away from the relationship if you want it to thrive.
She also highlighted that not having hobbies or your own friends circle was also one of the seven things that can kill your pairing.
Finally, she mentioned, that ignoring your partner’s trauma and issues can lead to a negative impact on your relationship.
In the post, Dr. Lalitaa said that she ‘needs to make sure that you are fully aware that this is a very broad post and each relationship is very different on its place, so please use this article as a guideline and consult professional support if needed’.
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